Thursday, October 15, 2009

October 15th

Today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day...light a candle tonight at 7 p.m. in remembrance of the little souls whose lives ended too soon and in support of those who have suffered miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant death.

I will be lighting a candle tonight in memory of my first son, Paul James. Though I have since given birth to a healthy, wonderful, boy who is the light of my life, I don't think you ever get over that loss.

Thank you, Becky, for adding PJ to your wall of remembrance.

Edit: After I posted this, I started remembering...and remembering...and remembering. My loss was on February 12, 2005 but I remember all the details like they were yesterday. I was closing in on the age of 35 eagerly waiting the arrival of my first baby that August. There are no words for the loss. The specific details of my particular situation are horrific and I won't saddle any of you with that information, but it haunts me. As time goes on, it doesn't haunt me daily anymore, but it is always there as an empty little hole in my heart.


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